The past couple of weeks have seen immense pressure being placed on the low-cost airlines of the industry as the media have talked about the potential decline of the no-frills sector. However, it is great to see that even during these difficult times, airline executives can still retain their sense of humour, none more so than the legendary 'Lord of the Quote' Ryanair chief executive, Michael O'Leary. When questioned about the possibility of Ryanair launching transatlantic operations in the future he is reported to have replied: "We only fly Boeing 737s and would be happy to fly you across the pond in one, leaving you to swim the last two hours of the journey." This follows just a week after he reportedly said "Take Gdansk. Who wants to go to Gdansk? There ain't a lot there after you've seen the shipyard wall," after a discussion about the enlargement of the European Union.
Mr O'Leary has become well recognised in the industry for his outspokenness, which leads as nicely onto the following business appraisals. Although these are not directly aviation related you could quite imagine many of these comments being used on the appraisals of staff in the aviation and travel business. They are all genuine extracts from employee appraisal reports.
"Since his last appraisal, this employee has hit rock bottom and has started digging"
"His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity"
"I would not allow this employee to breed"
"This employee is really not so much has been, but more of a definite won't be"
"When she opens her mouth, it seems it's only to change feet"
"This lady has delusions of adequacy"
"He sets low personal standards and then constantly fails to achieve them"
"This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot"
"This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts the better"
"Got a full 6-pack but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together"
"A gross ignoramus -144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus"
"He certainly takes a long time to make his pointless"
"He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier"'
"He has a knack of making strangers immediately"
"He brings joy to others, when he leaves the room"
"When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell"
"If you see two people talking and one looks bored - he's the other one"
"A photographic memory, but with the lens cover left on"
"A prime candidate for natural de-selection"
"Has two brains: one is lost, the other is out looking for it"
"If he was any more stupid he'd have to be watered"